It is just so simple to treat people well when they treat you well. However, the real test is when they treat you badly. When things like these happen, we feel hurt, bad, disappointed, sad, or even scared. Here we will explore how to keep it cool and be kind to others who do not treat you right.

Anybody can do you harm. It could be a total stranger, your best friend, or worse, your family. No matter how hard or strong you claim to be, the actions of other people, especially those who mean so much to you, can sometimes hurt you. You can’t control how others treat you, but you can control how you respond to them. So the question is how do you deal with those who have offended, mistreated, or hurt you? Others may say the answer is simple: You don’t deal with them at all! Well, actually, sometimes it is just not that simple especially when it’s a parent, spouse, or someone you just can’t cut out of your life so easily.

Sometimes, people are just unaware of how offensive or hurtful they can be, because of something they have said or done. At other times, you may be holding a grudge towards someone who means you no harm. The best thing to do is to have a conversation with that person and let them know how you’re feeling. A grown up conversation where both parties are willing to listen to each other is the key. You’d be surprised what a civilized conversation can fix. Next, always understand the problem that it is not really you, it’s with them. Remember that there will almost always be somebody who adores everything about you and says only nice things about you, but there can be others who are totally opposite, and hate everything about you.  They will have nothing nice to say. You have many people who love you, why focus on the one person who doesn’t? You’ll never be perfect. Jesus was perfect, and they STILL hated Him.

Another thing to consider is to never try to get even. When you let other people get you out of character, you give them power over you, this takes your focus off Christ. Don’t let anyone’s hate, drama, and negativity keep you from being the person He (Christ) wants you to be. Also, remember to forgive the offense. Sometimes, we have to forgive even if others are not sorry. Forgiveness is not about the other person; it’s about you giving yourself permission to emotionally move on, taking back your happiness. These experiences will help you grow in character.  It is not when life is good and we are blessed that we grow, it is when we go through a valley experience.   Getting through those tough times will eventually become a blessing.

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